I am a mermaid

Linden is preparing to shoot season two of her gorgeous “Mermaid Minute” webseries, and needs some backers. You can watch all of season one here, in case you’re a suspicious type, and I’ve helpfully posted in her enticing Kickstarter video below. So check them out and go help her fund season two (and get some awesome incentives while you’re at it). Isn’t it all charming? Isn’t this exactly what all children should watching so they don’t grow up evil and ocean-abusing?

(Yes, it is.)

1. I published an essay about my experience at Weeki Wachee’s mermaid camp in the April 2014 issue of Allure Magazine:

I talk about how scary it was for me to dive in after years of avoiding the water … but after interviewing all these mermaids (especially all those blissed-out Weeki ladies) for this blog, how could I not dive in myself? And a few months after doing the camp at Weeki Wachee (in June 2011) I went and got scuba certified in Nicaragua! It is all extremely uplifting and inspirational, so you should obviously go hunt down a copy right now. Thank you, mermaids!

2. I also published a little piece in the latest issue of Fairy Tale Review, a special Oz-themed issue edited by Timothy Schaffert and Kate Bernheimer that came out this spring. So what is my Oz story? A Little Mermaid/Wicked Witch mash-up of course! Here’s a snippet:

This should not have been my fate. When I lived in the upper world, I despised the water—seas, lakes, wells, rivers, rain-collecting buckets, even the dew drops on the petals of poppies—I hated it all. I was a creature of air, flying through it, feeling it split in my wake, my hair streaming out behind me and beneath me, a city that sparkled like emeralds below me. Often, my sister flew next to me, and we’d descend as low as we could, zigzagging around the spires of the great palace, laughing and singing. I try not to think about those days now, back when she was alive and we were free. I have rage, whole galaxies of it, but I have bidden my time down here, in the deepest ocean, where there is only darkness and light, tiny glowing creatures that illuminate this sad hovel.

But I am nearly ready. I have been collecting all their little parts for years now. I have teeth and tusks, scales and eggs, fins and spines, hearts and hides. Today I take the tongue of a mermaid who believes a prince will love her, when I can see well enough in my crystal ball that he already loves another. She thinks that her beauty makes her invincible, the way that she did, the way she still thinks she’s invincible with her ridiculous wand, that sparkly crown she fashioned herself. The mermaid, who looks so much like her, thinks she can move from one life to another and not feel the pain that comes with defying your own nature. Let her. Let her pain be but a taste of what she will feel, soon enough.

Glinda. The name alone makes me tremble.

3. I’m sure you guys saw that Sofia Coppola’s movie was greenlit by Universal–a live-action Little Mermaid movie with a script from the woman who wrote Edward Scissorhands, which is of course one of the best movies ever. This project was already in development (though with Joe Wright) when my own book was optioned by Sony in 2011, prompting a bunch of articles about Hollywood’s two Little Mermaids (like this one from Perez Hilton) when the news about my book came out. The second option of my book was up this past April (it had been renewed in late 2012), and Sony decided not to renew again. So even though my book had been in development for three years and there was a finished script from Shana Feste, who was also set to direct, and things looked pretty good as recently as January, a Mermaid movie is definitely off the table … for now! Please take note, movie producers with lots of dough!

Here is an awesome spoof of the Sofia movie from Funny or Die:

4. One thing that took up a ton of my time was putting together the special Mermaids edition of Faerie Magazine, which finally came out in December (and is on sale right now for $4.95). It’s really lovely and has tons of mermaid fiction, photography, interviews, destinations, and all kinds of other good stuff. I liked editing the magazine so much that I’ve gone on to edit two regular editions of Faerie (spring and summer 2014) and am working on the fall issue now. The regular magazine isn’t chock full of mermaids but they pop in; the spring edition featured an article on mermaid/lady knight Virginia Hankins, who was photographed by awesome mermaid photographer Brenda Stumpf, and the summer issue features a mermaid-y spread from Emily Soto. Here’s the image we used on the cover:

Also, the Faerie website sells jewelry, including this awesome mermaid pendant:

5. I hope you are planning on hanging out with me at MERMAIDS BY THE SEA in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, from September 18-21st! The fabulous Barbara Wynns will be hosting and the dashing Allen Sherrod will break a world record by staying underwater for 55 hours…! I know, my skin just wrinkled a bit when I wrote that, and it’s not like I need any more of those.

I managed to finish working on my Masquerade Ball costume after the holiday and New Year’s craziness at Dive. Hopefully they don’t get broken in my luggage! There was plenty of room in the overhead for my tail, I love how the new design is so much easier to transport—even if I still do get funny looks while carrying it around the airport and plane!

I didn’t sleep at all last night, I was just too excited and too thrown off by my New Year’s performances to settle down. I’m used to the our mer-dynamic at Dive, and am a little scared to meet so many new mermaids in one place—I hope they like me.

Falling asleep now, will write more tomorrow night.

Jan 6, 2014
Well. Writing more definitely didn’t happen as planned. There was just so much going on! I’ve been too blitzed out, waking up early, going to bed late every night. We all were, no one wanted to miss one second of the fun. I’ll break everything up into days.

I was eight or nine hours in the airport trying to get to North Carolina, and a few more mers were held back or had their flights canceled on them. Very sad and disappointing for them and for those of us that wanted to meet them!

Friday—I met up with Atlanis and her husband and got a ride over to the aquatic center along with Erin StBlaine, and her husband Darrell. We received our awesome badges (I felt like a VIP because our badges said “Staff” on them!) and boarded the bus for a trip to the aquarium with Mermaid Raina. The bus ride was fun, Thom Shouse entertained us with his ever absorbing stories, and I was thrilled to meet the twins behind the tails of Finfolk Productions. Abby and Bryn are very humble, very dedicated and fun. Basically, super cool woman who make super cool work. I also got to spend some great time chatting with Atlanis about mer-ing in general.

We both agreed that so many people have told us that being a mermaid just turned their lives around. I feel like this calling just swims up out of the dark at you, to keep you afloat when you are lost. For so many people, being a mermaid is salvation and safety. It was the same for me, it will be the same for so many others. I want to hold this safety in my hands, cup it close and let it enter and fill the voided world. We’re all doing something so special for each other. Transformative. Of two worlds.

We stopped for lunch at a cute little place on the water. I got to eat with a very friendly NC couple who were just getting into the mermaid scene, and Susan Gardner, who was stage managing Atlanis’s fashion show on Saturday. Everyone is so amicable and chatty. I even struck up the courage to introduce myself to Raina, who was very sweet.

Outside at the lunch spot

My lunch table

At the aquarium, we started off with a backstage tour. Backstage of the aquarium looks (and smells!) a whole lot like the backstage of Dive…which makes sense when you really think about it. My favorite part was an adorable sea turtle who seemed very interested in seeing his land-friends. He kept swimming at us and blowing little bubbles. You can’t convince me that these creatures don’t have inquisitive, active minds.

Sea turtle friend

Atlanis on the backstage tour

After exploring the rest of the aquarium for a while—some folks also went down to the beach—we climbed back on the bus and headed to dinner. At this point, our fins were drooping just a little bit, and our lack of sleep was catching us to us. The bus ride back to the hotel was mostly a sleep train.

At the hotel, we got ready for a mixer and pool party. In the elevator to the lobby, I was astonished to discover that the refined woman I was chatting with was Barbara Wynns, from Weeki Wachee! Barbara was one of the original Weeki Wachee mers. She is imperial, elegant and dignified. She is good friends with Dive’s tailmaker, The Mertailor, and knew a little about Dive Bar. It was so refreshing to talk to someone who performed day in and day out as we do up in Sacramento. She has been in the industry since the beginning. I know we were all honored to have her there with us.

Gracious Barbara at the aquatic center

At the mixer, I got to see Malena Sharkey and Robert Minnick, who I attended a Mermaid Portfolio Workshop with last year and am working with on another workshop this coming year as crew. I was so delighted to see both of them. At that point, I was itching to get in my tail and swim with some of the other mermaids, so I hopped in the pool with the Finfolk ladies and Atlanis in her new tail. After a while, more mers showed up, and the teeny tiny hotel pool was just lousy with flapping fins. You could barely swim across.

It was really, really cool seeing the Finfolk Productions tails in persons, as well as Merbella’s tails and others. The amount of love and care that goes into every tail that is made is moving. The differences are what makes us unique, and strong.

So many merfriends, so little time

Srs Mrmd Bznis

The hotel staff at the Hilton were phenomenal. They put up with all our crazy antics, the water all over the floor from carting tails around, the sequins and glitter everywhere and they kept the pool open for us long after their posted times. Major hats off to them!

The hotel pool was absolutely gorged with chlorine, and as a non-pool mermaid, that was rough. I think that we all had blurry vision and painful eyes by the end of the trip. I could personally take about ten minutes swimming with my eyes open before I maxed out.

Whyyyyyyy?

At the pool, I met Caroline, who lives in North Carolina and is one of my new favorite people. She’s going to be on the Mermaid Portfolio Workshop with us in August—hooray! After my eyes gave in, I hung around blinking a lot in the hot tub with Mermaid Bonnie from Tennessee. She’s a true Southern Belle sweetie, and her handmade tails are lovely.

Saturday: I woke up early again to attend Raina’s seminar on How to Work with Children as a mermaid. It was so excellent. Raina is well-organized and knows what she’s talking about. As a mermaid who performs at a set venue underwater, it was very helpful to see how our activities could have more outreach in our community in Sacramento. Barbara Wynns was right when she said, “Listen to this girl, she has done her homework!” I bought Raina’s book, which she signed, and couldn’t recommend it more for mermaids who are trying to get into the party professional side of things. I read the whole book on the plane ride back and can’t wait to share it with my team when I get home.

Raina’s talk, photo by Steve Anton

After Raina’s seminar, I walked over to the mall, which was only four min away from the aquatic center, to get ready for Atlanis’s fashion show. I had a lot of time to relax and do my makeup and hair. Backstage, I was able to chat with Hyli Kaiser, who is famed mermaid photographer Chris Crumley’s new muse. Hyli is quirky and fabulous with long red hair that can’t be beat! She and her husband are super adorable together, as are all the mer-couples here really. It’s nice to see partners support each other like that.

A bunch of the models were body painted by Erin, and the rest of us hung out backstage and talked, laughed and took a lot of photos. Hyli and I bonded over our mutual fear of ending up in a pile at the end of the runway, but the show went off without a hitch. I only managed to step on my lionfish fins once, so I felt successful, especially when I heard a child’s voice say, “That’s a lionfish!” when I started walking. Erin and Darrell did an astounding aerial performance, which was made even more impressive when Erin told me afterward should could hardly hear the music. The speakers were pointed away from her!

Raina and me backstage

Lionfish design by The Mermaid Atlantis, photo by Woodland Willow Photography

Lovely Atlanis in her handmade tail, photo by Woodland Willow Photography

Amanda the manta ray, photo by Woodland Willow Photography

I walked back to the aquatic center where Atlanis’s collection was photographed by Bob; so I felt comfortable with him and had a lot of fun waving my fins around. We got to take an entertaining group shot too.

The gang’s all here!

After all the photographs on land, Steve Anton grabbed some underwater shots of Atlanis’s collection. Steve wanted me to jump into the water for my first shot, which I was little nervous about, because I knew my lionfish fins were going to fly right off. Sure enough, they did! Luckily, Steve was still able to grab some really nifty shots—of course!

Clownfish design by The Mermaid Atlantis, photography by Steve Anton

Lionfish design by The Mermaid Atlantis, photography by Steve Anton

Child’s Mermaid Tail design by The Mermaid Atlantis, photography by Steve Anton

After the underwater shoot, we putzed around, and eventually everyone got ready for the masquerade ball.

The ball was nothing less than incredible. It was held at a natural history center and our entry way led under rows of blue colored, glowing archways into a photo booth area. A photograph was taken of you in your masquerade finery, and printed right there! My photo was incredibly unflattering and will never see the light of day—I blame my awestruck brain. After the photo area, a meandering path lead through displays of ocean life throughout time; enormous and terrifying whale skeletons hung overhead. At the end was a dance floor, and dining tables set around small display cases wherein little flora and fauna peered out at the masquerade company. Christomer couldn’t have picked a more perfect arena for the ball.

I also may need to mention there was free wine and cute bartenders.

I was able to eat with Malena, Bob, Atlanis, Eric, Erin, Darrell and Caroline—lovely dinner company. Atlanis and Erin had worked together to create silicone shells that lit up and glowed in the dark. We were all fairly mesmerized by their … tops … all night.

Atlanis, Malena and Erin are stunning, photo by Way Beyond Productions

My ball costume, photo by Way Beyond Productions

Hyli and hubbs, Way Beyond Productions

At the ball I was fortunate enough to spend some nice time with Thom Shouse, who was feeling slightly neglected through mis-communication. Raina and her boyfriend and mertender Sean had taken Thom kindly under their wing, and I sat at the table and chatted with him for a bit. Thom is such a sweet man, with a good and generous heart. Like talking to Barbara, I feel that we were all so incredibly rewarded at having the chance to have Thom there. They are both a big part of the foundation of what we do—and sweet Thom gifted me some merbeads and an adorable photo frame. I was deeply touched.

We all danced together—my favorite—and there was a siren song competition held. I missed most of it because I was chatting with Thom, but what I did hear sounded entertaing to the max. Many of the company danced till the band was ready to leave!

We can’t stop…and we won’t stop….  photo by Way Beyond Productions

At the hotel and afterparty was held, and buckets of the now infamous Mermaid Punch were consumed. The chlorine pool did another number on my eyes, as usual. I spent the majority of the time chatting with Meridian Mergiver, who is one of Thom’s ‘girls’. She is another California sea-sister, and I really enjoyed giggling with her and getting to know her better. She and her husband have a veritable menagerie of critters living with them – including bees. I am envious. She was wearing the tail that Thom made for Alyssa Milano in an episode of the tv show Charmed, and I felt like I was touching history when I saw that tail. I got some serious chicken skin. Pearl, Meridian, Victoria and Brittany Osborne and I were the last mers out of the hot tub that night.

Sunday: The third day most mermaids suffered the repercussions of the free alcohol at the ball and too much Mermaid Punch the night before. Things ran a little behind schedule – including me! I set my alarm on my phone, but neglected to turn it off of silent mode…so no alarm went off! I was heartbroken to miss Raina’s second lecture, and John Jay’s Breathholding class, which Atlanis had generously offered her extra ticket for.

I spent all my extra time that day getting alluring glitter threads sewn into my hair, chatting with Bob and Malena about our plan for the Bahamas workshop and wandering about.

Sparkle time

I was also able to swim with Malena, Erin, Caroline, and Atlanis. As simple as that was, it was probably my favorite part of the whole weekend. There’s just something so special about being submerged with your mersisters. I will follow them anywhere. It’s such a perfect feeling to see their flukes waving in front of me, leading me onward and upward; true seastars and mermaid loves. It was absolutely sensational to look underwater with goggles—a thing I hardly ever do—and see all the different tails swishing around. The festival had an entire pool reserved for mermaids only!

I have to re-iterate how fascinating it was to see the prodigious variety of tails and creativity that everyone brings to the tail-making process. There’s such a range, and we got a taste of nearly everything out there. Everyone looked splendid, from the most humble of fabric tails, to sequined beauties, to the big silicone stunners.

As was swam and played, mers started congregating on the pool edge for a big group shot.

Photo by Cate Vail, Siren’s Photopraphy

We gave a fluke in the air tail salute to finish it all off. Drums played in the background, mermaids danced, and everyone was spasmodically happy.

Fluke Salute!

We were all going to have sore muscles from holding our flukes in the air for so long, but it made me laugh to see us all with our tails flopping around and our merbums exposed to the breeze.

Afterwards, the first ever Mermaid Olympics were held. Malena, Erin and I ended up winning a bronze for the flop like a fish contest. The games were excessively cute and clever;  they featured events such as, trident toss, siren’s call, diving for dinglehoppers and even coloring! Bonnie won overall champ, which was very well-deserved! I wish I could have seen her and her partner, Mermaid Lei Loni’s, underwater lyrical dance from the surface!

Bonnie the champion, photograph by Steve Anton

After clumsily helping Bob and Malena strike their booth, we drove out with Caroline to meet everyone for the closing lu’au. At the lu’au, Finfolk was raffling off a silicone tail! Tension was high as they choose their ticket, and Mermaid Marla was the lucky recipient.

Marla wins her tail!

Before the Finfolk ladies drew out the winning ticket, they gave a short speech, which was concluded with a blessing from Thom, who made everyone in the room tear up. To quote Thom, “My heart is full of water, and when someone touches it, it leaks.” It was moving to see a first generation tail maker welcome a new generation into the fold.

Thom and Finfolk

After we ate and held the raffle, I was overjoyed to share a hula from my halau in Concord, Na Mamo No’eau. Despite a few technical setbacks (the restaurant owner couldn’t quite figure out how his sound system worked) everyone was so polite when I danced. I was shaking like a leaf, but all managed to go smoothly.

Photography by Way Beyond Productions

I was privileged afterward to introduce the mind-melting fire performance that Erin and Darrell put on. Those two are truly master performers, excellent at their craft and sent the weekend home with a literal burst of light.

Erin swallows fire!

Acro firedance

Darrell, Erin and fearless leader Christomer

We reassembled at the hotel pool one last time. Victoria was kind enough to let me try out her custom-built monofin, which swam like the creamiest of butter. None of us wanted the weekend to end, and it was a long time before anyone could bring themselves to go to bed and say goodbye. Several pints of lobby ice cream and oceans of happy tears later, I had to stagger off to bed. I couldn’t tell if it was the chlorine, my zero sleep, or the sadness of leaving the new and old merfriends that made my eyes burn like the dickens, but they needed to close on some of the happiest memories I had made.


Me and Bob saying goodbye

I did miss my hometown sea sisters with all my heart, and wish they could have experienced everything that I had been gifted. I especially missed my mermom sharing this new adventure with me, I know she would have had a blast. I am bursting to share all that I had witnessed, take on new projects, swim with them and give huge hugs on my return home. Leaving on a trip like this often makes you appreciate even more what you have at home, even if the trip is a fantastic one.

I can’t fully comprehend all the things that have happened in the short amount of time we’ve all been gifted to do together. The ball is rolling, the tides are turning and we are all realizing our true homes—with each other, even across the country and the world. I look forward to the next one, and hope I have the chance of returning. It’s time to meet the sea again.

Here’s some of what he said:

I knew I was different from an early age. I fell deeply in love with Ariel, the Little Mermaid, the first time I saw her. Her hair, her tail, the underwater realm… They enthralled me. My mother and her friends thought it was cute that I was in love with a mermaid. I wasn’t: I wanted to BE her. I wanted to live in Atlantica, swim with the fish, and someday fall in love with a Prince. Yeah, a prince. Growing up I didn’t know what ‘gay’ was, but I sure was it.

Fairy tales have been my escape. They helped me when my parents divorced. The familiar stories gave me a sense of clarity, that everything has a Happily Ever After. Finishing high school, I knew that being gay was what I was, and I needed a way to convey my talents in a different way, and I got into drag. And now, in the clubs, I do ‘Disney Drag,’ where I get to channel my creativity by breathing life into the characters from the stories I had read.

I love this, how someone like Kerry is able to draw strength and inspiration from fairy tales and mermaids and use them to infuse his own life with magic and beauty. I also think it makes perfect sense that a mermaid, in her perpetual state of transformation, would be a powerful symbol for someone coming to terms with his/her sexuality—and then embracing it.

Anyway, look:

Aren’t those gorgeous? I think we should all fly to Winnipeg immediately to see some awesome Little Mermaid drag. In the meantime, though, I asked Kerry a few more scintillating questions.

So what do mermaids and fairy tales mean to you?
Fairy tales have always been a part of my life as long as I can remember. My mom watched Disney movies all the time with me and my brothers since we were kids. I always loved reading about faraway magical lands and stories of love conquering all, Good VS evil. Fairy tales instilled in me a never-ending sense of optimism: I feel now if I remain positive, regardless what obstacles I’m facing, I’ll get my own Happily Ever After.

Why do you love mermaids?
I can’t honestly say why I love them. They’ve always been a part of my life. Since kindergarten I had a fascination with them; I was either reading Hans Christian Andersen’s tale, the Disney version, or I scoured our local libraries to find other stories about them.

I think their sense of wonderment was what drew me to them: these beautiful and dangerous beings that experienced life in such a different way. It made me want to know about them.

Can you tell me about performing as a mermaid?
I’m a Drag Queen here in Winnipeg, and I’m most known for my Disney/Fairytale looks, and most known for my Little Mermaid impersonation. I usually style my wigs to resemble her and then I dress like she would (I imagined if she was a real girl she would wear greens and blues) and I even have a mermaid costume I occasionally wear.

I know you’re familiar with Hans Christian Andersen’s story and his little mermaid. Can you tell readers about that? Can you explain why/how both his story and the little mermaid resonate with you?
According to what I’ve read, Andersen fell in love with women and with men throughout his life, and at one point he wrote The Little Mermaid after being rejected by Edvard Collin. At the time homosexuality was not an open topic and hardly discussed. The rejection and the feeling of being unwanted drove him to write the story of the little mermaid. The story resonates on multiple levels for me. I was terrified of actually coming out to my family, and I feared rejection. I knew since I was a kid that I was different, that I wasn’t like everyone else. While my brothers always had girlfriends, I didn’t. I think that the mermaid’s desire to be human mirrored my own feelings: I wanted to be something more than just a straight boy; I wanted to be different. I wanted to be me. But it took me a long time to come to terms with my sexuality and I finally told my family, and I was surprised that nearly all of them were accepting. Luckily for me I didn’t have to consult with a sea witch to do that!

Do you love Disney films, too (and Ariel)?
Disney is the reason why I got to love The Little Mermaid! It was the first movie I ever saw and it remains my favorite movie. I used to work at our local Disney store until it closed, and I got to Disney World with friends every year with friends. I love everything about Disney, as I have a large collection of Disney items … my room resembles Ariel’s grotto; I’ve got Disney stuff galore! As an artist I am also blown away by the art in the movies. The animation, colors and designs are incredible, especially in The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, and Sleeping Beauty, which are my favorites.

Why do you think that mermaids, and fairy tales, are so popular right now?
I think that everyone is already so familiar with the stories they grew up with, and that now that more people are writing their own versions or adapting them we want to create further connections with the characters we already know and love.

How do people respond to your love for mermaids (or drag act, or mermaidliness generally)?
Some think it’s weird that at the age of 22 I’m still watching Disney movies and collecting mermaid memorabilia; some don’t get it. I just can’t shake the feeling of wonderment and beauty I get when I read about them. Drag isn’t accepted by everyone, but nearly everyone I talk to loves what I do and appreciate I’m taking the fairy tales of our youth and reimagining them in a different light.

A small team of us have been working and working to get everything shiny and perfect. And there’s all kinds of amazing content: beautiful original fiction and poetry from writers like Alice Hoffman, Aimee Bender, Keith Donohue, Francesca Lia Block, Matthea Harvey, Tera Lynn Childs, Sarah Porter… Articles on everything from Mami Wata to Superman’s mermaid girlfriend to cover model Hannah Fraser and tail maker Eric Ducharme and ocean conservation… Not to mention a bunch of featured mermaids and glamorous destinations and photography so vivid you’ll start to hear the crash of ocean waves and the flip of shimmering tails moving through water.

Here he is at the judge’s table, winning:

And here he is with the other winners (plus last year’s winner Canadian Mermaid Marie), looking like the patriarch of one gorgeous pale-haired deep-sea family with a penchant for blue:

Here is our penetrating Q and A:

How did you end up at MerPalooza?
I ended up at Mer-Palooza after seeing the event online and my pod “NCMerfolk” decided to make a trip together down to Florida. We stopped on the way down and went for a swim in an underground spring and on our way home we stopped at the Jekyll Island to rest our tails before returning to hustle and bustle of life on land.

Are you a bona fide merman?
Yes.

If so, how long have you considered yourself to be a merman and/or been into mermaids generally?
I have been a bona fide merman in my heart since I was a little boy playing in the sand at the beach. I became a certified frogman when I was 19 in college and decided to recertify this spring. When I was doing my research about recertifying I came across free diving and monofins. Through further reading I found the links to the mermaid and merman tails. After a few discussions with tail makers I ended up ordering my silicone tail from Abby and Bryn Roberts, co-owners of Finfolk Productions in St. Paul, Minnesota. I am the president of the NCMerfolk, which is the fancy name for our pod in Cary, North Carolina. I can be found swimming with my little mermaid, Casidy, at the Triangle Aquatic Center three times a week.

What is it that appeals to you about mermaids/mermen?
I love the freedom to be your own spirit! I have no fear of depths and a great fear of shallow living! Subscribing to their motto’s I think is at the heart of what makes each and every mermaid and merman decide to put on a tail. I love the water so anything that allows me to spend more time in it is a plus. I also love bringing my daughter’s imagination to life by being able to swim together with her in our tails. I think we have a responsibility to use our gifts to give back to the community that we live in. Being a merman has given me the opportunity to travel around the US “sharing the mermagic” with other pods.

Can you tell me about your recent astounding win at MerPalooza?
My win at Mer-Palooza was EPIC and AMAZING! I was happy to enter the pageant and made a lasting friendship with Merman Christian. He and I enjoyed a bit of friendly competition from not only the pageant but a swim from the end of the pier to shore. Our dear friend, Caribbean Pearl being the competitive spirit that she is added a bit of spice to the pageant by entering her own merman last minute! The Mer-Palooza Royal Court enjoyed dinner together after the event and then came back to the hotel to enjoy mer-company poolside along with the Mer-King’s special Mermaid Punch!

With friends at MerPalooza, in human guise

Do you have any other merman plans coming up?
I just finished up a three-week trip visiting pods in Maryland, California, Nevada and Minnesota. I had a wonderful visit with merfolk from across the US. It was inspiring enough that when I got back to North Carolina our pod decided to setup our own mer-gathering schedule for January 2014 in Cary, North Carolina. We have been invited to make appearances at many pirate events this coming spring on our coast. We are looking forward to being in the Christmas parade this year with a group of fellow scuba divers.

How large a role to mermaids/men play in your everyday life?
I believe that being “mer” is a way of thinking and living. I believe you have to live your dream everyday and if you keep that idea in your heart, mind and soul you are truly living the “mer” life. I have “MERMAN” on my license plate and I get asked at least once a day about it. I also wear a custom carved merman necklace around my neck that gets just as many questions. As it turns colder outside I can be seen wearing my mer-inspired hoodie that looks like a fleece version of my silicone tail. I think being “mer” can be as big or little part of your life as you want. For me it is like having a tail on even when I don’t have mine on in the water. You just have to live the dream with no regrets and never looking back.

On their Facebook page, Melissa and Faith call their genre “gloomy girl punk rock,” which is really what every band should be. Plus they sing about mermaids, which everyone should, in a gloomy girl kind of manner. Well, they did one mermaid song, called “Mermaiding,” and made this goofy, celebratory, super-fun video to go with it. Look!

If that doesn’t make you want to slip into a tail and throw your Fender Stratocaster underwater, I don’t know what will. Here are some more ultra-glamorous photos, followed by my penetrating Q&A with this fish-tailed duo:

So tell me about your band. How’d you two get together? What’s your music like overall?
MELISSA: I had seen Faith’s old band, Hooray For Everything, play around town throughout the years. It seems like we were always bonding over our love of grunge music, old movies and feminism. I describe our music as surf-goth. It is definitely catchy but there is a bit of a dark, rough edge to it. Our friend Jack told me we sound like a goth version of the Go-Go’s. I’ve always liked that description.

FAITH: Melissa’s old band Sweet Nothing and my old band Hooray for Everything used to play together. When both bands weren’t active anymore, we said, hey, let’s play together! And history was made. I guess our music is a mix of chick riot, dark wave, surf and garage/punk.

You say your lyrics are influenced by feminine fiction and myth. Can you talk about that?
MELISSA: Faith writes all the lyrics so I don’t really contribute to that side of things. But we both have an interest in female characters which I think is totally natural but strangely enough it does make us stand out from other bands. I think it’s cool. I have heard enough songs about falling in love and partying to last me a lifetime so working on songs about a variety of female characters is more interesting.

FAITH: I try to tell a story with most Dark Beach songs, to take recognizable tropes and characters from fiction—robots, mermaids, vampires, swamp monsters—and make them compelling and sympathetic and new.

What is it about mermaids that appeals to you?
MELISSA: What doesn’t appeal to me would be a shorter list! I’ve always been attracted to the otherworldliness of them. They kind of remind of vampires, there’s a certain romanticism to them and they look like us (to some extent) but can never fully be a part of our world. Faith has done a lot of research on Mermaids and she found that in most cultures mermaids originally had a negative connotation. They were often known as sirens who sunk ships and caused a variety of problems for travelers. So it’s interesting that today a typical mermaid is thought of as beautiful and carefree. Their legend has definitely morphed a lot over the years and their complex history only adds to the appeal. I have also always had an affinity for beach/surf culture.

FAITH: I think the most appealing thing about mermaids are that they represent a woman who is unattainable and untouchable to human men. They’re mysterious and their worlds are off-limits to us. There are so many kinds of mermaids, too. Hollywood mermaids are all fun and good, but the fiji mermaid and other grotesque half-fish-half-human creatures fascinate me as well.

Do you guys identify as mermaids at all? Have you always loved them?
MELISSA: Yes, in spirit. I have always been into mermaids and my interest only seems to intensify as I grown older. It defies logic (ha ha).

FAITH: Yep, I’m a walking mermaid. I have always loved mermaids. It’s a childhood fantasy I can’t seem to shake.

Can you tell me about your song Mermaiding?
MELISSA: Faith wrote the song. In preparation for this interview I listed to the “demo” version she gave me back in the summer of 2011. Of course I was drawn to the subject matter and I remember really liking what I refer to as the “rocking” part that comes in around 2 minutes in. The song seems to have elements of rockabilly and surf but the quieter parts remind me a bit of a lullaby. I think overall it’s pretty unique. I remember having trouble envisioning what to play during the intro but once we decided on the cold start of the tambourine and bass drum things easily fell into place. The sparse intro really makes it stand out from our other songs.

FAITH: As a kid and teen, I used to be obsessed with all things Marilyn Monroe. I remember in Norman Mailer’s biography on her there was this quote that really stood out that someone said about her, that she was a “mermaid in shark-infested waters.” I thought of mermaids for the first time—and female beauty—as prey. When writing “Mermaiding,” I imagined a mermaid’s life as difficult and scary, constantly eluding men with hooks and staring sailors, and peace as a sisterhood-love with fellow mermaids.

Did you guys get tails for the video shoot or did you have them/use them before?
MELISSA: I had bought a black tail but decided to rethink my costume about a week before the shoot. I didn’t have enough time to order a new tail (shipping would take too long) so I made my tail with some fabric form Joann’s Fabrics. I didn’t finish it until the day before we left for filming! Everything came together last minute but overall I am happy with the monochromatic “surfer girl” look.

FAITH: I bought it for the shoot, but you can bet it’ll be used again. Maybe we’ll play a show in tails!

What was the video shoot like?
MELISSA: I had originally envisioned doing a darker, more moody video that aligned with the song lyrics but we pretty much went in the opposite direction and for the most part it just felt like playtime in the pool. Shooting underwater was definitely challenging but I was expecting that. The hardest part of the video: keeping the wig on my head!

FAITH: Like a super fun mermaid pool party for two. And, yes, we didn’t realize what a challenge it was to a) keep wigs on our heads and b) play our instruments underwater. Being a rock and roll mermaid ain’t easy.

Have you hung out with other mermaids/people in the mermaid community?
MELISSA: I haven’t. Fellow mermaids should hit us up on Facebook! It would be great to meet them, even if it’s just a digital meeting. It seems like a highly creative community that I would like connect with. I also want to mention that Faith and I did a podcast discussing mermaids, maybe people in the community would be interested in checking it out.

FAITH: No. But I would love to!

Why do you think people like mermaids so much, anyway?
MELISSA: There’s a certain segment of the population that will always be in love with beautiful, mysterious female characters. Also, it seems like mermaids are truly independent, free of day jobs and the variety of responsibilities us mere mortals have put upon us by society. That type of freedom and playfulness is very appealing to most people.

FAITH: They’re hot. They’re mysterious. And you can never catch them, you can never “have” them, you can never sleep with them, you can never get too close to them.

Any advice for aspiring mermaids?
MELISSA: Keep your head held high both above & below the sea.

FAITH: Use a lot of bobby pins when you fasten that wig to your head, girl.

I love how Andrew’s Weeki photos feel like they could have come straight from way back when, from the days when Weeki put on elaborate, choreographed shows like “Mermaids on the Moon” and “Alice in Waterland,” and yet they all have an unmistakably modern, diamond-sharp edge to them, too. Also, I am very jealous that a whole pile of manatees showed up for the shoot, managing to weasel their way into many of the shots. Yours truly will return to Weeki next month and I might have to haul an elaborate camera under the water to lure those fame-seekers back!

Anyway, I recently asked Andrew many illuminating questions about the calendar, Weeki Wachee, being an exceptional mermaid beau, and mermaids generally.

So how did you get to be so involved with mermaids?
Growing up on a small island on the west coast of Florida and surfing most of my life, I’ve always been around water and had plenty of time to dream up what was swimming below the surface. Mermaids were always at the top of my list.

What’s the appeal of mermaids to you? Why do you think they’re so popular?
Throughout history, wherever there’s a body of water there’s some form of a mermaid myth, so either mermaids are just part of the collective unconscious or they really did or do exist. Ninety-five-percent of the ocean is undiscovered so they can’t be ruled out. As for their popularity, I think as a race we are always looking for mythic stories and images to distract us from our everyday lives and I think mermaids do a good job of that, flying freely through the oceans without a care. And of course women want to be them and men want to be with them.

Andrew photographing the mermaids; photo by John Athanason

When did you first visit Weeki Wachee and why is it such a special place to you?
I was a wide-eyed five-year-old on my first visit and ever since I’ve had a consistent ongoing image running through my mind of the great Weeki Wachee mermaids. Years later, while living in New York City, I heard about Weeki’s “Save our Tails” campaign to raise funds and awareness for the park and reached out to Robyn Anderson and John Athanason to donate my services. I’m really stoked with the projects that we’ve done together through the years. I find them much more rewarding than my day job of photographing for magazines and advertising.

Having the world-famous Weeki Wachee mermaids as your focus point and the beauty of the natural spring as your studio is a dream come true. I am constantly amazed by their athleticism and grace and how they make it look so easy. Believe me, it’s not! The Weeki Wachee Spring truly is a miracle of nature and one of the great fountains of youth, all you have to do is watch the former mermaids perform like giddy teenagers again to know that it’s magical. The water is around 100 years old when it comes out of the spring’s head after filtering through the limestone aquifer at a rate of over 165 million gallons a day. It’s the clearest water I have ever photographed in, and that’s pretty special to me. I hope in some way that we can help raise awareness about Florida’s springs and aquifer and how vulnerable the whole system has become. Many are slowly being affected by the heavy use of nitrates from fertilizers and some have dried up all together because of Florida’s increasing need of water. I think the recent rise in sink holes is giving us a wake-up call to pay attention to what is happening below the surface.

Can you tell me about the Weeki Wachee calendars you’ve done? What was the inspiration for 2014?
This is the fourth calendar that we’ve done with Weeki over the years (and the fourth in Weeki’s history). In the past we based the themes on the holidays of each month, like a Mermaid Witch on a broom stick for October, a Mermaid Bunny for April, and so on. This year we wanted to make it about the mermaids and the spring itself, more natural, plus we were excited to have the Mertailor/Eric Ducharme’s tails involved.

The day we arrived to start shooting, a herd of ten manatees arrived in the spring and stayed for four days until the day we left. I’ve never heard of that many manatees hanging over a period of days at Weeki. It was great to see and incorporate what seafarers from the past thought to be the original mermaids, the manatees, along with the Weeki mermaids. Talk about natural magic! It was one of my all-time top experiences.

I grew up on old Florida and the kitsch that went with it so we try to keep a little of that in how we shoot and design the calendars. Weeki Wachee is the last of the pre-Mouse invasion attractions that has not only survived but is thriving.

What is it like dating a famous mermaid? =) Are you constantly covered in glitter and scales?
I had to get over the glitter thing years ago, I’d be on a shoot and someone would come up and say, “umm you know you’re covered …” and I’d be like “I know, I know.” Now I’m just “yep, that’s right, got a problem?” Bambi the Mermaid is the smartest and most fun-loving mermaid I’ve ever met and a true genius at her craft. We’ve shared a lot through the years, she’s my best friend and my true soul mate. Don’t get me wrong, she can cast a long shadow of a tale, but I’ve been able to hold my own so far. In the last couple of calendars we’ve had a “Find Bambi” game with small hidden images of her throughout the calendar. This year she’s limited in her hiding but she’s there.

One of Andrew’s many gorgeous shots of Bambi the Mermaid

Can you tell me about your experiences at the Coney Island Mermaid Parade?
In 1988 when I first moved to NYC I was hired by Travel and Leisure Magazine to shoot portraits of the mermaids and the participants in the parade and it was an absolute blast. I’ve had some incredible fun over the years at, in and around the parade but I’m a lover of its early days as a smaller art parade. These days it’s great if you’re in the parade but as a viewer it’s gotten a little too crowded for my taste with way too many ornery photographers (I tell everyone I’m a plumber that day).

I know you’ve also photographed Bambi the Mermaid all over the world. Can you tell me about that?
We’ve created projects everywhere from Weeki to the islands of Fiji. One of the best was an awesome trip to Turtle Island, where they shot the movie Blue Lagoon. I’d been to Fiji once before to surf but this was crazy special, we would be taken by boat with Bambi’s costumes and props plus amazing food and spirits to our own different deserted beach each day. We created a great body of work based on the Feegee Mermaid and Blue Lagoon plus got to hang with the “God” rock structure that Brooke Shields’s character feared so much in Blue Lagoon. We gave him a much-needed make over.

EVEN MORE IMPORTANTLY, the second annual MerPalooza “International Mermaid Convention and Party” takes place this weekend in Tampa, at the Bay Harbor Hotel. I’m flying down on Friday and will be reading and signing my new book, The Fairest of Them All, on Saturday at 2pm (there will also be copies of Mermaid and my novel Godmother, provided by Tampa’s Inkwood Books). I know that Eric Ducharme will be there with plenty of mermaids, that several Weeki ladies will be in attendance, that Stephanie Sims will be hosting another mermaid pageant, and that all kinds of other delights will be in store. You should obviously start heading to Tampa right now.

Speaking of my new book, which just came out yesterday and which I have to tell you about this one time, The Fairest of Them All is a fairy-tale mash-up about Rapunzel growing up to be Snow White’s stepmother (it’s okay for teenagers but not for kids!). Eleanor Brown calls it “intricate, inventive, and charged with magic.” Jamie Ford says he “loved this unexpected spin on the story of Rapunzel, this strong-willed devourer of hearts.” Caroline Leavitt says that it “unfolds like a waking dream, with prose that shimmers like cut diamonds.” You can read more praise for it here. And here’s an excerpt.

Because of an ongoing battle between Simon & Schuster (my publisher) and Barnes & Noble (a fight that has nothing to do with me), The Fairest of Them All will not be in brick-and-mortar Barnes & Nobles. So please, if you’re inclined, tell your friends, share the link for my book, write a song about it, get the cover tattooed on your chest, or show up at MerPalooza (or your local indie) this weekend and buy five copies… I will be eternally, eternally grateful if you do. Thank you!