I am a mermaid

So you may or may not have seen the following extremely informative video on youtube, Advice for Young Girls from the Little Mermaid, which pulls out some of the main lessons from the Disney film for the edification of young girls – and aspiring mermaids – everywhere:

The video was created by Danielle Uhlarik for The Second City Network (as part of her Advice from a Cartoon Princess series, which also features Danielle as Snow White and Belle) and has been viewed, like, a billion times. So it is sort of weird if you haven’t seen it, frankly. (Second City also brings us the Sassy Gay Friend series, which includes this Hamlet spoof and really should include a little mermaid one, since if anyone needed a sassy gay friend that wasn’t a singing fish, it was Ariel.) There will be much more little mermaid talk, Disney and Hans Christian Andersen style, on this blog in the future. For now, I hope this video and illuminating interview will remind you of the profound message at the heart of both stories: giving up your voice for a hot prince is always a good idea.

So Danielle, what inspired your Advice from a Cartoon Princess series?
A little bit of common sense and a lot of desire to dress up like a princess.

Growing up, my sisters and I loved the fairy tale princesses, as did most little girls, and I also loved shows like Saturday Night Live, The Muppets and Monty Python.  When you marry those inspirations you tend to see things you adore with skepticism, humor and playfulness.

My sisters and I loved to make fun of each other.  But sometimes we’d need breaks, so we’d find other things to mock like the messages in those tales. Definitely was not anything new, and I’m sure many people had the same realizations about the stories. I played around with the idea through various sketches in my Chicago performances. When The Second City started The Second City Network, I decided to convert the messages as “advice for little girls” so it would fit better in a web video format.

What kind of response have you gotten?
The response to the series has been so phenomenal. I have to credit The Second City for their incredible work on the production, because they visually brought the material to life. The series has been featured on various entertainment sites: Entertainment Weekly‘s PopWatch, The Huffington Post Comedy, Jezebel, and many more.  But I adore how much it has been passed around Twitter and Facebook.  When The Little Mermaid video was released, it was the #4 Tweeted video that week, thanks to everyone who passed it along.

I have received everything from Hollywood studio meetings to marriage proposals to gender studies papers to this blog’s interview. But I love hearing that people are entertained by it.

Is the little mermaid secretly your favorite cartoon princess?
She definitely has my favorite costume. Seashell bikini tops = never out of fashion.

How was it, dressing like a mermaid and being surrounded by animated bubbles and sea plants?
The most fun I’ve had as an adult since last weekend, when a bartender didn’t believe I was older than 21. That was so much fun.

Do you ever secretly suspect you might be a mermaid?
No, absolutely not.

I mean, I can breathe and sing underwater pretty effortlessly, but no.

There are some sailors who have sculpted images of me on the front of their ships, but no, the idea of being a mermaid is ridiculous.

I maybe thought Splash was a documentary of my people, but to answer your question, no.

How would you compare the little mermaid to the other cartoon princesses?
Like the other princesses, she has no problem falling in love with strangers pretty quickly. She’s also absent a mother figure and maybe doesn’t have a full resume of work experience/skill sets that would impress, say, anyone.

However her hair is red, and she’s a pretty successful hoarder. So, you know, she’s got that going for her.

What do you think Ariel/the little mermaid should have done instead of giving herself a complete physical overhaul, giving up her greatest asset, leaving her family and world, and heading up to the prince’s castle?
Googled or Facebooked that prince first before undergoing so many dramatic changes.  Stranger danger. I know those resources didn’t exist then, but she’s a princess of a sea, so her father had to have some kind of foreign leaders database, or at least knew a guy who knew a guy.

Were you yourself ever unduly influenced by cartoon princesses, as a young lass?
Of course!  I wore the finest princess gear (read: hand-me-down tutu) to help my mom with highly important royal matters of business (read: Walgreens runs for toilet paper). In fact, I still believe there is a little bit of princess in me (read: I’m just waiting for my father to reveal that we’re a super rich royal family, so I can collect my treasure, get a fancy driver, and sleep in past 10am everyday.) 

And what do you think of the Disney movies as opposed to earlier versions of these fairytales (like Hans Christian Andersen’s Little Mermaid)? The HCA little mermaid didn’t even get the prince at the end!
I actually remember reading Hans Christian Andersen’s The Little Mermaid when I was young. I was familiar with the concept that the book’s always better than the movie. That mermaid didn’t succeed and for punishment of trying, she evaporated. The message to kids was more like, if you’re bad, the mermaid will have to live in air molecule limbo for more than 300 years, but if you’re good, maybe we’ll get her out on bail after 299 years.

I’m not sure I was always good kid, but I’ve been known to ring a few bells in my days to make up for any not-so-perfect deeds. If that didn’t save a Hans Christian Andersen mermaid, at least some angel somewhere sprouted wings.  So we’ll call it even.

Later this week: poetess Matthea Harvey and Berlin’s singing mermaid, Lorelei Vanora. Next week: the Millionaire Matchmaker herself, Patti Stanger, gives the little mermaid advice, just in time for Valentine’s Day….

(And Weeki Wachee, later next week!)

Hannah Fraser – aka Hannah Mermaid – is a professional mermaid who swims among coral reefs alongside dolphins and whales and sharks and other sea critters and performs as a mermaid all over the world, educating people about ocean conservation (she works with the Surfers For Cetaceans and Whaleman Foundation to end the slaughter and captivity of whales and dolphins), inspiring others to put on tails and go “mermaiding” – which seems to be a new and growing phenomenon – and generally being gorgeously dreamy and aquatic. You might have seen her on 20/20 last summer:

And here are some photos in case you don’t believe such a lady exists:

Photo by Stuart Macleod

Photo by Jeff Bedrick

Photo by Ted Grambeau

photo by Cipto Aji Gunawan

I sent Hannah some questions over email, and shall meet her in person in Las Vegas this August, where she’ll be a featured performance at the first annual World Mermaid Awards. That is right. Mermaids from all over the world will converge and be mermaidly together…

but more on that in a riveting future post.

Here is my Q&A with Hannah:

When did you realize you were actually a mermaid? =)
I always identified with being a mermaid when I was swimming as a child, and made my first tail at age nine after seeing the film Splash starring Daryl Hannah. I made my first adult tail nearly eight years ago after doing an underwater modeling  job and realizing I looked more at home underwater than on land. Once I began swimming in the tail I felt that it was a natural movement and very familiar, as if I had found a part of myself that I had just forgotten.

Why do you think mermaids are so popular and appealing to humans?
I thinks it’s because all life originated and evolved out of the ocean and even as humans we swim in liquid for the gestation period before birth. We come from water, we are made up of over 70% water, and when we are swimming we feel like we have come ‘home’. It’s also a way to experience what it would be like to fly, the closest we can get to total weightlessness.

The mermaid myth is a perfect combination of earth meets ocean in a combination of two species.

What is it like, swimming in the ocean with your powerful tail? How different do you feel as a mermaid versus as a normal human woman?
It’s amazing how once I put my tail in it’s like I am imbued with a few extra super powers! I can swim faster with more power and maneuverability, I can hold my breath longer because I am more comfortable and at one with my surroundings, and I have less fear of underwater animals because I feel like I am one of them!

Has any art or literature or film inspired you in your mermaid career?
Splash was instrumental for me in inspiring me to create a mermaid tail. It was the first time I saw a mermaid in film and realised I could create a tail for myself. There was a lot of beautiful mermaid art around as a child that fed my quest for beauty and mystery. I never found many good novels about mermaids… I am still searching!

[disclaimer: obviously Hannah has not yet read Mermaid]

Have you ever seen or met a merman?
I haven’t met a merman with a tail yet 😉 but I have had the pleasure of swimming with true watermen such as David Rastovich (pro free surfer) and others who are at one with the ocean and connected to its inhabitants in a way that is truly magical 🙂

What advice do you have for aspiring mermaids?
Go through the process of creating your own tail. [Hannah offers tail-making and other tips on her website’s FAQ page.] It’s hard and there is a lot to consider, but you get a much better understanding of how it works, what fin shapes create power, and how to create a tail that is original and unique. It does bother me that there are so many people just copying a design that someone else created rather than letting their own creative juices flow! Your tail is your signature! Make it unique! As far as getting started as a professional mermaid model, I suggest that you do modeling first so that you understand how to work with cameras, angles and looks. You can also learn to perform by appearing at kids’ parties for free to get started. Talk to dive ships about people who are doing underwater photography to see if they would take your photo to start a portfolio. Get involved in ocean preservation projects to help conserve the mermaids’ home!

Next week: Weeki Wachee!

So legendary comic book artist Michael Wm. Kaluta lives in a beautiful, jam-packed New York City apartment filled to the brim with wonders. There are books from floor to ceiling practically that he can pull out and open to pages you can just fall into… old old storybooks with ladies draped around the first letter of every chapter, crumbling books you’ve never heard of with passages he’ll read to you that will break your heart wide open. And then there are his own colorful images all around, each of them opening into some new world… And in the main room, right above the television – where, a year ago, he and I sat down for a Marlene Dietrich festival because he is the kind of man who can appreciate him some Marlene, and let’s face it that is the best kind of man to be – is one of his famous mermaids, her long long tail swooping down and weirdly, wonderfully, turning into the feathers of a peacock…

Here’s a semi-menacing photo of Michael (who is in fact very sweet unless you happen to be a slow-moving pedestrian, and who is regularly moved to tears by loveliness) at his desk taken by photographer extraordinaire Kyle Cassidy:

Photo by Kyle Cassidy

And here he is being slightly less menacing with yours truly at Carnegie Hall, seeing Max Raabe and the Palast Orchester. I know, it was very fancy.

And here are some of his mermaids, a few of my favorites pieces… because who wouldn’t like to hold a mermaid in hand and swim along the ocean floor with some mermaid sprites, dipping into sunken treasures?

I recently sent Michael some questions about his mermaids and mermaids generally, and in his ornate and gentlemanly fashion he replied thusly:

What is it about mermaids that you find so alluring?
Part of the allure of mermaids has to be their sinuous physicality, embodying in their shape the mysterious artful movement of women, combined with the Mermaid’s unavailability. I’m not attracted by the “tempting sailors to their deaths” part of their brief. I know I could never swim to their rocky island havens… but seeing them out of reach, having them offer charms and graces and the heavy suggestion of physical intimacy while my nature forces me to only observe… observe and fantasize: that makes for a very strong attraction point, embracing their mythos, not their promises.

Do you have any specific attraction to the sea… or are mermaids more purely creatures of the imagination to you?
The sea has always frightened me in a thrilling, never-ending way; I’m drawn to it but very cautious of edging too close. I can stand in amazement on its shores and let its rolling depths inspire “all sorts of stuff”. The sea has that permeable, ever-changing but eternal surface under which anything can be right at your feet without you ever having an inkling. There’s a Robert E Howard line from his novel ALMURIC: “My mind peopled the distance with nightmare shapes.” That sums up my take on The Sea as metaphor for What Lies Beneath, The Unconscious, The Hidden, the “PLEASE Don’t Jump Up Out Of The Ocean And Eat Me” frame of respect. Adding Mermaids to The Sea allows me to understand and accept its awesomeness vicariously. Mermaids are very At Home in the Sea… what mysteries it has for them aren’t things that I’d ever have to come to grips with. My fears are their commonplaces. By letting myself identify with a Near-Human creature that is accustomed to the deeps and shallows, friends, or at least associates with all it contains allows me safe access to that wonderland. Once safely underwater as a being who belongs there, I can begin to shape their realities and my fears into strong, evocative imagery another land-bound individual can respond to without getting wet.

Have you always been attracted to magical figures, and mermaids in particular?
As a child Mermaids were, perhaps, the least considered of The Magical Creatures. I grew up surrounded by fields, copses, swampy bottom land and briar patches… the only water, except during a Cape Cod Vacation, was a creek, runnel or even more likely: a mud puddle. The most secret place in that youth was that several inches under a ground cover of may apples… their palmate leaves made a false floor to the woods: if you lay down and looked under them, there was an entire level unseen where little people and other small things could abide. This area wasn’t mysterious at all, nor was any part of the woods. I didn’t think often of centaurs, unicorns or dragons, but I did have a definite Giant: he came out at night, way across the fields, sweeping the ground with a light he held in his hand… He’s probably still there, but turned into a tower on the prison on the island in the river next to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

There was also a Witch’s bower… I never saw the Witch, but the old bushel baskets, clay flower pots, crushed reeds and woven vines that combined to make her nest among the blackberry patch was all I needed to evoke the certainty of her existence.

What is it that you like about drawing/painting them?
Mermaids are so perfectly Art Nouveau: graceful design motifs. I’m naturally inclined to construct stories in picture form to try, by capturing their essence, to enhance the impact of my visual argument. I feel I do my best work when I rely on a visceral reaction to the shapes the individual elements take on, and Mermaids, having such a terrifically evocative shape in themselves, propel me well on my way to a good composition without me having to work from the blank page.

The content of a piece, its “why,” increases dramatically when the shape of a Mermaid is present: because they live inside peoples minds, bringing a Mermaid into a picture also brings their hidden associations into the art.

Over the years, have you refined the way you approach drawing/painting them?
The more I learned about human anatomy and the more I studied fauna the better I could imagine mermaids. I can remember the day I woke up from the common illusion of Mermaids being Women With Tails to the idea Mermaids had the FORM of women, but were creatures in their own right, was the day I began to pay attention to their gills… Eventually gills became quite a strong part of the design element. From my early days of happy, zoftig Mermaids to my days of webbed, gilled seaweed haired ocean dwellers was a series of epiphanies, each one more Ah-HA than the previous… the result was going to books about fish for Mermaid reference as opposed to photo collections of beautiful women.

Why did you once declare that you would only draw mermaids, robots, and mushrooms?
I’d become tapped out drawing the Comic Book Heroes so often asked for when I’d do sketches at Comic Book Conventions. I had a personal belief that each new sketch should have something different than the previous sketches… as imaginative as I felt I was, I ran out of new poses. But with Robots, Mermaid and, of course, Mushrooms, the field was open again! I doubt I could ever run out of compositional ideas using Mermaids!

During the time of the Robot, Mermaid, Mushroom era, I did ONE drawing of The Shadow for a really avid Shadow fan… but I drew him as a fish…

Are you a fan of any other mermaid artists, or any specific mermaid art (including movies, books, etc)?
I’m a fan of all the Mermaid Art I’ve ever seen: the subject doesn’t seem to allow for Bad or Dull art. I couldn’t begin to list the terrific Mermaid art that’s out there: hardly a week passes that my attention isn’t drawn to yet another marvelous Mermaid depiction, often by an artist I’ve never heard of before. Folks who frequent your Mermaid Site will get a good overview of what’s out there for the Mermaid Watcher.

Have you found that people respond to your mermaids in any special, specific way (as opposed to the rest of your art)? That, is do you find that mermaids hold a special attraction for people generally?
There are people who ONLY like my mermaid art, and others who would only care for a Mermaid Drawing if Bat Man were riding her back. Fairly often someone who finds my Mermaid Art delightful, looks me up and finds the “other” art… I get emails from these folks, expressing their happiness at being led to my work through their love of Mermaids.

What about mermen? Have you ever drawn one, or cared?
Several: big guys!!! I can’t say I’ve yet done an iconic Merman, but I think I’ve captured some fine Mermaid images that’ll stand the test of time and taste.

As an expert of sorts, do you have any advice for aspiring mermaids?
I’d blush to put forth my ideas of What Becomes a Mermaid Most. I could offer my images as possible evocations of “Mermaidliness,” though it seems a cheeky thing to do. I’d be way out of my depth in any other capacity.

Next: the devastating Hannah Mermaid….

So I am a huge fan of novelist Alice Hoffman and her lovely, lyrical, magic-infused writing, and I am secretly star-struck every time my agent (who is also her agent) mentions her name. Sadly, we have yet to meet and become best friends, though I suspect it is only a matter of time since writers who write about mermaids clearly share an otherworldly bond.

Don’t you totally want to have tea with her in some garden?

Image by Deborah Feingold

ANYWAY, so in addition to writing beautiful adult books (like the just released The Red Garden), Alice Hoffman writes extremely charming books for younger readers and one of those books, Aquamarine (there was a movie, too), is named after a mermaid that two best girlfriends find living in the bottom of a murky old pool, as you do.

Here’s an excerpt from the book:

… it was a while before they realized that a mermaid had surfaced at the shallow end of the pool. Her hair was pale and silvery and her nails were a shimmering blue. Between each finger there was a thin webbing, of the sort you might find on a newborn seal or a duck.

“What are you two staring at?” the mermaid said when she turned and saw the girls gaping.

Her voice was as cool and fresh as bubbles rising from the ocean. She was as beautiful as a pearl, with a faint turquoise tinge to her skin and eyes so blue they were the exact same color as the deepest sea. But her watery beauty didn’t mean the mermaid knew her manners.

“Stop looking at me,” she demanded, as she splashed at the girls. “Go away!”

The mermaid’s name was Aquamarine and she was much ruder than most creatures you might find at sea. At sixteen, she was the youngest of seven sisters, and had always been spoiled. She’d been indulged and cared for and allowed to act up in ways no self-respecting mermaid ever would.

Her disagreeable temperament certainly hadn’t improved after spending two nights in the pool, tossed there like a stone or a sea urchin at the height of the terrible storm. Chlorine had seeped into her sensitive skin and silver scales dropped from her long, graceful tail. She hadn’t eaten anything more than a mouthful of that horrible herring the girls had strewn into the pool.

“You heard me,” Aquamarine said to Hailey and Claire, who were mesmerized by her gleaming tail and by the way the mermaid could dive so quickly, she disappeared in a luminous flash. When she surfaced through the seaweed she was not pleased to see they were still there. “Scram,” she said. “Stop bothering me.”

The mermaid glided into the deep end of the pool, the better to see Raymond at the snack bar. She had been watching him ever since she found herself stranded in the pool. His was the first human face she saw. She gazed at him with a bewildered expression, the sure sign of a mermaid in love.

I know. She’s amazing.

I emailed Ms. Hoffman a few penetrating questions and here are her luminous responses:

Why are you attracted to magic in your own fiction? Have you always been attracted to the supernatural and otherwordly?
I grew up reading fairy tales, and then fantasy and science fiction. But magic is in nearly all great fiction, from Wuthering Heights to Kafka’s great stories.

What inspired you to write Aquamarine, and about a mermaid?
Aquamarine was inspired by the summer I spent at a town beach club in Long Island when I was a young girl. Magical place. And mermaids are empowered, beautiful, dreamy, timeless, who wouldn’t want to be one? Or at least write about one.

What do you think of mermaids and their continual appeal? And in what ways does the figure of the mermaid appeal to you personally?
I’m not sure I understand the appeal of mermaids, but it’s there for most girls and women. Personally, I was born under the sign of the fish, always lived near water, and always looked for mermaids.

Do you have any advice for aspiring mermaids?
Aspiring mermaids should always live near water, wear the color blue, buy aquamarines when available, search the horizon. Rescue themselves and anyone else who happens to be drowning.

Come back on Monday, when I talk to artist (and mermaid draw-er) extraordinaire Michael Wm. Kaluta.

So I had a deep suspicion that my one true love Tim Gunn might appreciate the strangeness and wondrousness of mermaids, and I emailed him and asked if he’d talk to me for a bit about mermaids and fashion for my brand new blog – and this, my very first post. Because as you will see – and as this blog becomes filled with wonders over the next many months – mermaids are everywhere in our lives and culture, including the bust- and hemlines of the extremely glamorous mermaid gown. And Tim Gunn knows everything. When he agreed, even gallantly claiming to be “honored” by my request, I done fainted dead away and had to be revived with smelling salts. And then the following took place.

I know. He is awesome.

Do you feel that mermaids and mermaidly allure have a place in today’s fashion world?
When we consider the catalysts that are essential for inspiration in the fashion industry, few have the staying power or the potency of mermaids, owing largely to the fact that mermaids have been part of world literature, lore, art, and artifact for such a very long time. There will always be a place for mermaid-inspired fashion, providing that the designs are conceived in a manner that’s relevant to the current moment.

In what ways do you think that women can add mermaidly allure to their own wardrobes?
Mermaids aren’t afraid to show off their curves and celebrate their gender. This is what gives them such extraordinary allure, at least in my humble view. There’s a fashion lesson is this: dress for your curves and your womanliness, wear clothes that fit well, and walk – or swim – with confidence. Finally, never turn down a sequin or paillette.

What do you think of the mermaid dress? Do you have any favorite examples?
The mermaid dress is, by definition, about drama; form-fitting from bust to knee (and usually strapless) and with a cascading burst of fabric from the knee to the floor. You find them in abundance on the red carpet and some of the most beautiful are by Marchesa. But my favorite mermaid-inspired garment is the mermaid sheath, which was introduced in the late ‘60’s by the legendary Norman Norell. His sequined covered gown quickly became an American fashion classic.

Can you describe any other mermaid-inspired fashion? What did you think of Gaultier’s 2008 collection, for example?
Gaultier is ever the showman. I found his fall 2008 couture collection to be expectedly over-the-top and, frankly, entirely too literal and, therefore, costumey for my taste. However, the look from the collection that Marion Cotillard wore to the Academy Awards was stunning. (For me, evaluating fashion is all about context; who’s wearing it and for what purpose.) And owing to the fact that Ms. Cotillard won an Oscar that year, Gaultier’s dress received a lot of attention, a lot of very positive attention.

What do you think the appeal of mermaids is in general? Are you yourself a fan?
I’m a huge fan of mermaids (and mermen for that matter), because their place in art and literature is so long-standing (3,000 years!) and crosses every culture and region of the globe. There will always be a fascination with creatures that transcend the world as we know it, and mermaids are among the more accessible of those creatures.

Do you think there is any place for merMEN in the fashion world, and do you have any advice for aspiring mermen who might be feeling a bit overlooked?
I always say that fashion is so much easier for men than it is for women, but I need to recalibrate that thought when it comes to mermen, because it strikes me that they pose more of a fashion challenge than mermaids. Fortunately, a merman’s fashion need only be addressed from the waist up. This means that plenty of options are available, from a classic polo shirt to a full-on tuxedo (minus pants, of course). Though we must be reminded that color options for a merman’s apparel should be informed by the color of his flesh and scales.

Do you have any advice for aspiring mermaids (and mermen)?
Advice? Don’t let the world aquatic compromise your personal style and…practice holding your breath.

Next up: novelist Alice Hoffman.